Boundary Boss: Essential Tips for Setting Boundaries that Unlock Your True Self with Terri Cole

Full Show notes: http://untameyourself.com/348

When we let fear hold us back from setting boundaries, we miss out on healthy relationships and real love.

What keeps you from setting clear boundaries with the people in your life?

Are you afraid of judgment? Being thought of as high-maintenance, mean, or controlling?

Or maybe you don’t know HOW to set boundaries in a way that works?

In today’s episode, we’re talking with Terri Cole, licensed psychotherapist and author of Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free. In her book, Terri teaches her readers how to set boundaries in a way that will help us live healthier, happier lives.

I have to be honest (always!): I rarely finish a book. But when I received my copy of Boundary Boss, I couldn’t put it down. I finished it in three days!

As I was reading, I kept thinking about you, my listeners.

If you’re searching for ways to live an authentic life as both fully human and fully divine, you need to set boundaries.

Boundaries aren’t about being bossy or controlling or selfish. Boundaries are about making clear your preferences, desires, limits, and deal-breakers to live a more honest, embodied life.

Among other things, clearly and consistently communicated boundaries:

Are an act of self-love and self-respect
Show you to be a trustworthy person
Prevent feelings of bitterness and hurt
Hold everyone accountable in a relationship
Helps you attract the right people into your life

But setting boundaries when you haven’t before can also be scary.

Fortunately, boundary-setting isn’t all-or-nothing. It comes down to doing the next right thing, one baby step at a time. In Boundary Boss, Terri walks us through those baby steps in a way that is accessible and totally doable.

Join us in today’s episode to hear more about how feeling empowered and respected really is possible.

In episode 348 of the Embodied Podcast we discuss:
[9:15] How boundaries build trust and keep you from second-guessing yourself and others
[11:33] How communicating your boundaries is a generous act and does not make you “high-maintenance”
[19:36] How enforcing boundaries helps you attract the right people and repel the wrong ones
[22:20] The power of direct communication to strengthen relationships
[28:05] The different forms of communication and why we use them
[34:07] How we can determine what our limits are to be able to start communicating them
[39:34] What the different types of boundary pushers are and how to deal with them
[44:44] What a “VIP Section” is and how to be discerning about who we allow in it

Resources mentioned by Terri and Elizabeth in the episode:
Download your Boundary and Codependency Resource written for you by Terri
Buy Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free - https://boundarybossbook.com/
Listen to previous episodes with Terri:
Boundary Bootcamp with Terri Cole - https://untameyourself.com/podcasts/ep271-boundary-bootcamp-terri-cole/
Terri Cole on Real Love Revolution - https://untameyourself.com/podcasts/ep147-terri-cole-on-real-love-revolution/
Terri Cole on Partnership and Healthy Treatment of Big Hot Emotions - https://untameyourself.com/podcasts/ep23-partnership-and-healthy-treatment-of-big-hot-emotions-with-terri-cole/
Check out Terri’s website - https://www.terricole.com/
Listen to Terri’s podcast, The Terri Cole Show - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-terri-cole-show/id1038357955
Watch Terri Cole Real Love Revolution™ on Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-OC1zN27enpTA_eNWB7dKw
Follow Terri on Instagram - http://instagram.com/elizabethdialto
Check out the Embodied Living Center - https://embodied.untameyourself.com/
Don’t miss an episode of The Embodied Podcast - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/embodied-with-elizabeth-dialto/id998131872?mt=2

QUOTES FROM THE EPISODE:
“Many of us were trained to think that having a preference was burdening someone else." (6:25)
“Make sure that you’re not confusing compatibility or easy-goingness with compliance.” (7:34)
“How people respond to boundaries shows you if people want to be in the same kind of relationship with you that you want to be in with them.” (37:25)
“It is my responsibility to clearly and cleanly and effectively communicate what it is that I want.” (47:48)
“Disordered communication is the foundation for disordered boundaries.” (50:01)

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Website: https://untameyourself.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elizabethdialto/
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Podcast Website: https://untameyourself.com/podcast/
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