Do you know any Boundary Bullies? These are people who want what they want regardless of how you feel about it. They can act in overt or covert ways to ram their agenda through. Interacting with them can be stressful and leave you feeling defeated and drained.

In today’s video I cover:

-- The connection between your own blueprint or past experience with boundary bullies and whom you are attracting into your life today.
-- The 3 Questions to ask yourself to identify the original boundary bully
-- How to Stop the Auto Yes
-- How to Create Clear, Concise & Consistent Boundaries with Boundary Bullies

Those of you who are familiar with my work know that the first step to changing anything is to try to get to the root of the original injury. Your boundary bully downloaded blueprint from childhood is where we begin. During your childhood, were you allowed to draw boundaries, disagree with the majority or say no in your family of origin? Did one of your parents or caregivers dominate the others in the group? Were you encouraged to assert yourself or would differentiating result in punishment? Chaotic family systems where there was abuse, addiction, neglect or extremely high expectations for children usually do not encourage or teach healthy boundaries. But fear not, you can learn.

Download the free guide that goes along with this episode: https://terricole.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Boundary-Language-Tips-and-Visualization-Exercise.pdf

TIME STAMPS:
0:00 - Introduction
0:55 - Why we need to figure out where our relationship with boundaries began
2:27 - Questions to reflect on to get to the root of your boundaries
5:20 - The three questions to ask yourself to identify whether you're having a transference
8:07 - How to ease into saying "no" instead of automatically saying yes
9:11 - How to stay calm in a difficult boundary situation
12:41 - How to change the relationship dynamic you have with a boundary bully
14:46 - Why being super clear, concise, and consistent helps when stating a boundary
18:24 - Not everyone deserves the privilege of being in your life

RELATED VIDEOS:
Why Codependents and Narcissists Can't Break Up: https://youtu.be/Fp1auZKZQHs
How to Set Boundaries With Impossible People, Including Narcissists: https://youtu.be/ccF6VFIdPCg
How to Create Bulletproof Protection Against Psychopaths and Narcissists: https://youtu.be/dDTF5iXvbi4
Codependents + Narcissists, Heal the Toxic Cycle with Boundaries: https://youtu.be/VqwxFVfsIWE

ABOUT TERRI COLE
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist and global leading expert in female empowerment. For two decades, Terri has worked with some of the world’s most well-known personalities from international pop stars to Fortune 500 CEOs. Terri has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible, and then actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change i.e. true transformation. She empowers over 250,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, Real Love Revolution and Boundary Bootcamp + her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. She is also the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free (April 2021)

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RESOURCES:
BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/terricole I no longer offer one-on-one coaching/therapy sessions but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs.

As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp’s resources. If you choose to sign up for Better Help’s service, I will receive a commission on the referral but please know that I only recommend services that I know & trust.

No No Narc: I created this course to teach you the strategies I’ve used for more than 2 decades in my psychotherapy practice to help women break free of dysfunctional patterns and learn how to prioritize themselves. https://www.terricole.com/nnn-special-offer/

My book, Boundary Boss: https://boundarybossbook.com

Boundary Bootcamp, my 8-week signature course, carefully constructed to take you to the next level of empowerment in all your personal + professional relationships using a positive and proactive boundary skillset that no one ever taught you. Until now: https://terricole.com/boundarybootcamp

https://www.terricole.com/gethelp/ — If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.

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